The Great Escape

A Skeleton Key to CAGLIOSTRO THE GREAT

Drawing Hugh Crane / Cagliostro the Great as both a prisoner and a stage magician was mostly just a straight forward attempt to visually summarize the character as depicted in RAW’s Schrodinger’s Cat Trilogy.

Though as my scribbling progressed I came to notice that this imagery also held personal meaning as a pretty on-the-nose metaphor for how I was feeling with my job as a Graphic Designer & Pre-Press Tech for a direct marketing firm.

It’s a pretty brutal gig in terms of soul crushing drudgery, a pure Rushkoffian nightmare, with constant & unreasonable deadlines, always on call responsibilities, and a pandemic related reduction in staff that saw my department reduced from 4 down to just me.

Though by and large, all of the people at the company, all the way up and down the corporate ladder, are entirely lovely and brilliant people. The people are beautiful, just trapped in the ruthless system of a genuinely tough business.

For the most part the job involves working with really big brands, some of which I’m happy to work with, and others decidedly less so. The credit card companies are the toughest to rationalize, though they’re somewhat balanced out by civil rights groups and some of the better charity organizations.

When rumors began circulating that we might get work from the Trump campaign I panicked and scrapped together an emergency back up plan, just in case they were true. It would have been a reckless and messy exit, but the rationalizations have to end somewhere. The rumors turned out to be untrue, or at least the deal went unsealed.

My back up plan was sincere, but impractical, the beatings continued but morale did not improve…

On particularly bad days I would stay up late applying for jobs somewhere, anywhere else. Though TBH the pure volume of work burned me out pretty good, and with most places still shut down from the pandemic, a feeling of hopeless resignation set in.

When I drew Hugh Crane as a prisoner I was drawing this resignation.

I was trapped, but that didn’t mean I couldn’t still make at least some magic, right?

2 days after I finished my drawing of CAGLIOSTRO THE GREAT – The prisoner, magician, mystic, escape artist, 2 things happened.

We received a project from Trump JR. & I got an email alert that my old teaching position was available.

I used to teach high school computer science in North Philadelphia. The job did not pay well enough to keep me afloat, which is how I ended up where I was.

Before I know what’s what, I’m being offered the same money I’m making at the current gig to return to my teaching position. How can I say no? IDK, bc I didn’t!

Just like that, I give my notice to the once inescapable prison that I’m leaving, and start a new life, closer to the heart.

Cagliostro says 10 people that know what he knows would be very formidable indeed, now I don’t know if I know what he knows, but I’ve just started my second week of teaching 500 7th-12th graders what I know, and that ain’t nothing to sneeze at!

N.B. I don’t think they necessarily mean it as a compliment nor an insult, but there is a strange consensus amongst students, across multiple years, grades and classes, that I remind them of Spider-Man / Peter Parker. They tell me this multiple times a week, not knowing that this is exactly the vibe I’ve been shooting for since I was like 8 years old. My class is a pretty easy A, bc with great power comes great responsibility :)))

PARTS UNKNOWN

A SKELETON KEY TO GOOD OLD EARTH

Around the time this comic takes place my Mom took me to Delaware Park to meet the Ultimate Warrior, we had to wait in line for like 7 hours in sweltering heat, but it was everything to me as a kid.

(If you google the Ultimate Warrior you’re likely to find some unfortunate opinions the actor who played him expressed, none of which were a part of his character, which remains a figure of extreme mystery, hailing from Parts Unknown.)

It’s kinda funny, given the whole darn point of this comic, how much I genuinely struggled to get it done. With no hint of irony, I basically re-lived the experience of becoming hopelessly frustrated with the creative process, to the point that I actually intended to scrap the whole thing numerous times. The only thing that saved it was that since I was working digitally the files remained on my computer and every few months I would stumble across them and revisit the wreckage to see if there was anything I could salvage. This process went on for 3 years. 3 YEARS! All over 4 simple pages.

So as much as I was remembering, and trying to share, this lesson that my mom taught me, I was also having to prove that I’d actually learned it, which wasn’t as easy as I assumed it would be.

THE SOUND OF SILENCE

I like using coincidence as a creative guide, because it feels like it opens up the process to something bigger than just my conscious imagination. For example, I was either going to give my Mom a Black Sabbath or a Simon & Garfunkel t-shirt to wear, (Her 2 fav bands) and just as I was about to commit one way or the other, a Simon & Garfunkel song started playing on a TV show I had on in the background. The TV show was The Leftovers and the song was featured in an emotionally climactic/pivotal moment.

So that pretty much settled that, because all things being otherwise equal between the 2 choices, it’s fun to let synchronicity tip the scales.

Though this set off another line of thinking, because the comic was already called “GOOD OLD EARTH” with “Old Earth” being Wu Tang slang for “Mom”, but now I’m thinking do I go with a Simon & Garfunkel reference for the title? Or maybe something from Black Sabbath, in a have-my-cake-and-eat-it-too kinda way? So I begin to scour song titles and lyrics for appropriate fragments to pull for a new title, and as I’m doing so, while having no luck whatsoever, sure enough in the background The Leftovers features a Wu Tang Clan song in a completely goofy and improbable scene. I stopped my search immediately and let the title stand.

DOVE STA MEMORIA

I long ago stole RAW’s use of “Dove Sta Memoria” as my go to epitaph, as “rest in peace” irks me as being overused to the point of meaninglessness. “Where Memory Lives” seems a more profound sentiment to me. Memory being the tricky, emotional, chaotic thing it is.

My mom had a tough life, especially her last few years, and after she died there weren’t many comforting words passed around about it, except from my older brother. Though my Uncle John, her older brother, managed to get something through the emotional maelstrom. “Remember the good times,” he told me. I was irritated when he said it, because I was a jaded and traumatized 12 year old, and it felt like an easy cookie cutter thing to say. But this story is what I remembered when he said that, and it was something I held on to. It must have been difficult to try to say anything to me at all, at that time, the circumstances being what they were, let alone something helpful, so it turns out he kinda nailed it.

Autobio comics bring in another level of trickery too, because I’ve learned through experience that adapting memories into comix comes with something of a cost. The memory gets partially overwritten by the adaptation. You lose the fuzzy edges and specific inexpressible ambiguities. The memory of the event and the memory of the comic fuse together in a weird amalgam.

I first noticed this in “I was a Teenage Six Million Dollar Party Horse.” An autobio comic about my being saved from a self destructive spiral by a compassionate homeless man. When I was working on the comic I was drawing the man’s face from memory, but now if I try to remember his face I can only see the comic version.

It’s a trade off. You get to have your memory transformed into an objective and shareable medium, but also you lose some of what made it yours.

(I think The Never-ending Story 2 has a bit about this, I remember it scaring me as a kid, though I can’t quite remember the details, which seems appropriate.)

In closing, The Leftovers is a great show, and I highly recommend it :)))

6:01

601Most every morning it takes me at least 2-3 shakes of a lamb’s tail to identify THE ALARM what kicked me from ZZZ satori.

Open fist smacks down again and again and again until what made the noise stop?

Oh Strange Numbers Beeping Box what do you want from me!?! Get up from what? The notion of time then occurs. Yes, right, but which one? Seven. I have to be somewhere at 7. Where? Work. Why? What? Okay. How long then until I must not sleep? Ultimately impossible mathematical contortions arise, abide, & cease. And what are habitually the final calculations? 10! More! Minutes!

(That I stayed up late to write this will hopefully amuse me in the morning’s groggy delirium)

[Nota bene: It didn’t]
bc – 12/04/06

DUBLIN IS BURNING

BLOOMING! On a bus to NYC, weather by Van Gogh. Reading that Usylessly unreadable book of odyssey, on the Mahayana, in the long memory, going forth by dayagain!

The Psilocybin speaks more of the many in THE VOICE OF ALL THE BLESSED. Metemorphoses of word & thought through Spacetime, this light as a riverGeneral Semantics: Our use of language can severely alter our experience of Universe. Meanwhile, mine animism eyes spy translucent streams of organic ether, the open system, Alleluia! The Neurogenetic jam box spins Akashic records as the wheels on the bus go round and round.

The King and I will have our talk soon, of that much I am certain. He’s been on his cell phone speaking in foreign tongues for an hour now, when his call is finished, we will speak of things.

The King is dressed in the very most resplendent fineries, a man of gold and diamond and silk.
A full page of TEXT embroidered on his shirt, soul on ice! I’ve a Dogs Playing Poker tie
amongst my usual dorky rags, I hope I look ridiculous enough!

DAMN! Look at Shortie right there! (Across the way) Only just made of electricity!

A shimmering bundle of shakti, I wish for to tell her! “Excuse me, Miss, but it seems you’re a manifestation of the Waters of Life which pour into the world inexhaustibly, thank you.” Bah! She already knows. Everyone already knows, after their own fashion, and changing everyday, smiling then to full capacity, so help me Fucking Christ! Finally, after 600 pages, Jeems Jokes drops the F BOMB.

Abu is an Ambassador from Nigeria. (Foolish artisan myself, sir, what news?)  The language he was speaking has no name and he thinks it odd that I would assume it might. In Africa they have over 2,000 languages, most of which are nameless, communication is problematic. All around the world we speak different dialects of one same language, Abu suggests. (The logo substance of which the word is merely a reference!? Snoogans.) The rise of tyrant war lords and the resulting cultural isolation balkanized the once common language of ancient Africa. (Falling tower mythos seem to recur.) He tells me then of the African land, of their abundance, of a world not yet but rather to may-be. (4 times was the city rebuilded, Hooo Fasa.) He likes dialectic, the universal language, a babelfish called JIVE swims towards Wagadu, and the bus stops in Manhattan. “It was nice to meet you Abu!”

There’s the MAIN MAN then! Fellow bus passenger, and smiling face. We’ve MADISON UNDERGROUND business now if ya’ll’ll excuse us, our adventure having only just begun.
NYC sun shines us a welcome.

Hello to everyone!
and how’s your deal?
A fine thing indeed
it sounds and to all
the best of luck.
More of everything please
and do keep the change.
Thanks a million
and have a nice day!
Eventually I meet a girl who makes me look ridiculous enough, THE END.

REINCARCERATED PARTS BOYZ

Once upon a whatchamacallit, MC BEN and I were posted up at the parts counter at Baker Jeep Eagle, whiling the day away on the early internet, probably blasting The Pretty Tony Album, when JEFF HARRIS burst into the scene bragging about his amazing mystical powers!

In this case, he was claiming to have mastered the art of reincarnation, such that he could come back in whatever form he wished.

He’d been clinically dead once before, IIRC, though the story shifted back and forth between him being shot in the head and a car accident that sent his head crashing into the dashboard radio. In either case, he was left with an indent in the center of his forehead that gave the impression of an anti third eye, and a predisposition towards seizures. An early archetype of Blvd mythology.

He once gave me puppy dog eyes while trying to convince me to come smoke crack with him and a sex worker in the side bathroom. When I very politely declined his generous offer he pouted for the rest of the day. Then the next day he pulled a knife on me, threatening to cut me up if I ever engaged in that very same activity that the day before he begged me to indulge in. This isn’t inconsistent behavior, of course, just multidimensional characterization :)))

So when a twice born dark prophet claims to have mastered the endless cycle of death & rebirth, you might as well hear him out!

I figured I’d put him to the task of solving the central mystery of Indian Religion & Philosophy:
“What if you don’t want to come back at all?”

Without hesitation, he exclaimed: “Follow me!”
We walked out into the back lot, and he pointed down at the asphalt:
“See that right there?”

The only thing I could see was a small, insignificant pebble.
“This?” I said, holding up the little rock.

He smiled, nodded, and walked away.

I’m 99% sure he was just doing a bit, but on the other hand, I kinda maybe got his point…

BEHOLD THE SOPHIC HYDROLITH!

“You hear what you want to hear, but you believe what you know!”
– JEFF HARRIS


[WILL INSERT AUDIO OF JH’S STORY ABOUT THE FOGHAT CONCERT ONCE I FIND IT]

SIGNAL/STATIC

Though the VCR and accompanying VHS library were excellent tools for exploring ideaspace, live TV was my constant companion.

10 or so channels of broadcast signals, permeating the skies, dialed in through the static of a temperamental TV antennae.

It was definitely an imperfect connection to the global village, but there was a certain charm in trying to adjust the rabbit ears to catch just enough of the transmission to see the show. Unwound wire coat hangers adorned with tin foil, bent this way and that, until some random and arbitrary arrangement magically tuned in the desperately sought signal.

For bonus points this was often done on black & white TV sets, because though color TVs had been around for 2 decades already, those more expensive sets were usually reserved for adult spaces, and most other TVs I’d encounter as a kid were ancient, tiny, and lacking in color.

Then came one day the cable!

Video Home Systems


A point of pride in my youth was figuring out how to program the VCR, which basically just meant scheduling when, what channel, and for how long the VCR would record. An unimpressive capability by current standards, but for a 7 year old in 1987, what wanted to watch late night hockey games, it was pretty neat. Hyperbolically marveling at the complexity of VCR programming was a staple of 80’s sitcoms and stand up comedy, and I very much enjoyed having a one up over the adults, no matter how arbitrary.

Though I wouldn’t unlock the true power of the videocassette recorder for a couple more years, when I stumbled upon the magic of AV inputs & outputs.

In addition to the VCR we also had a Camcorder, which was itself itself a miraculous gizmo, and while I had fun enough making terrible home movies, there was something even better that it could do…

The Camcorder recorded onto these small tapes, VHS-Cs, which couldn’t fit in the VCR. So if I wanted to watch something recorded by the Camcorder I’d have to use these yellow, red, and white tipped cables to connect the Camcorder’s output ports to the VCR’s input ports, at which point the signal would go from the Camcorder to the VCR to the TV. Even as a live feed, with the obligatory recursive feedback loops, But then! I noticed the Camcorder also had input ports and the VCR also had output ports, which gave me a crazy idea…

So let’s say, hypothetically speaking, I rented Batman (1989) from the local video store, and I put the VHS in the VCR, with the AV cables connected so the signal was going out from the VCR and into the Camcorder, and I pressed play on the VCR and record on the Camcorder, could I make my own copy of Batman?

My grand experiment. Too good to be true though, right?

Imagine my delight when this great work was accomplished!

It was a 2 step process whereby I had to record from the original VHS to a VHS-C and then back to a blank VHS.

I began earnestly and diligently archiving the sacred culture of my people on super long play magnetic tape. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Wrestlemania VI, The Great Outdoors, Robocop, everything that was good and awesome in my world went into the collection. My bootleg akashic records. Information do want to be free though :)))

The Same Roturns


I’m a little bit too old to be a digital native, the media sphere of my youth was comprised of an electric meshnet of cable TV, the VCR, and a camcorder. With these now primitive tools I cobbled together my analog worldview.

One of my earliest memories, around the age of 3, is an obsession with the rewind button on the VCR. I had a VHS recording of the Looney Tunes short film “Duck Amuck” that I would obsessively watch over and over again. In the cartoon Daffy Duck gets into an argument with his animator, which escalates into a surreal metafictional hullabaloo. As soon as the story reached it’s epic conclusion, with a long press of a button, I’d return again to the beginning. An interactive, non-linear, medium aware, story circle, repeating again and again and again, until! I broke the RWD button. One of the first times I remember ever really getting into trouble as a kid.

Broken RWD buttons were epidemic in early 80’s VCRs, resulting in the proliferation of a separate device made just for rewinding VHS cassettes. Ours looked like a red sports car. It’s little engine roared as it rewound tapes back to their beginnings at incredible speed. VHS tape rewinding etiquette may eventually come to the attention of future anthropologists, wondering about the cultural significance of the ancient aphorism “Be Kind, Rewind.”