Once upon a whatchamacallit, MC BEN and I were posted up at the parts counter at Baker Jeep Eagle, whiling the day away on the early internet, probably blasting The Pretty Tony Album, when JEFF HARRIS burst into the scene bragging about his amazing mystical powers!

In this case, he was claiming to have mastered the art of reincarnation, such that he could come back in whatever form he wished.

He’d been clinically dead once before, IIRC, though the story shifted back and forth between him being shot in the head and a car accident that sent his head crashing into the dashboard radio. In either case, he was left with an indent in the center of his forehead that gave the impression of an anti third eye, and a predisposition towards seizures. An early archetype of Blvd mythology.

He once gave me puppy dog eyes while trying to convince me to come smoke crack with him and a sex worker in the side bathroom. When I very politely declined his generous offer he pouted for the rest of the day. Then the next day he pulled a knife on me, threatening to cut me up if I ever engaged in that very same activity that the day before he begged me to indulge in. This isn’t inconsistent behavior, of course, just multidimensional characterization :)))

So when a twice born dark prophet claims to have mastered the endless cycle of death & rebirth, you might as well hear him out!

I figured I’d put him to the task of solving the central mystery of Indian Religion & Philosophy:
“What if you don’t want to come back at all?”

Without hesitation, he exclaimed: “Follow me!”
We walked out into the back lot, and he pointed down at the asphalt:
“See that right there?”
The only thing I could see was a small, insignificant pebble.
“This?” I said, holding up the little rock.

He smiled, nodded, and walked away.

I’m 99% sure he was just doing a bit, but on the other hand, I kinda maybe got his point…

BEHOLD THE SOPHIC HYDROLITH!

“You hear what you want to hear, but you believe what you know!”
– JEFF HARRIS

[WILL INSERT AUDIO OF JH’S STORY ABOUT THE FOGHAT CONCERT ONCE I FIND IT]